With the holidays now over, for those co-parenting, post-divorce, probably have some horror stories. Perhaps, there was a battle of the trees, which family could have the biggest and brightest. Maybe, it was the present money pit, who could find that new game system or spend the most money on presents. If so, these are not unique situations, but there are ways to co-parent successfully.
Planning for holidays, birthdays and other special events
Now that we have gained the co-parenting battle scars, we can do better this year. First, plan ahead of the time. Do not make assumptions. Both ex-spouses should speak to each other about how the holidays, birthdays and other special events should be handled. Will these celebrations be done together? Will they be done separately, and what days will each parent get? Once an agreement has been made, stick to it.
Keep conflicts internal
Co-parenting is all about working together for the best interests of the children. This means that, even if the ex-spouses still have some conflicts, they should keep them to themselves. This means not only not fighting in front of the children, but also minimizing fights between the ex-spouses. Since they both must work together, there needs to, at least, be a “working” relationship. Otherwise, relationships fray and working together will become much harder, necessitating the intervention of lawyers and judges.
For our Fort Myers, Florida, readers, remember, the divorce process is not just about separating one life into two. It is also about maintaining some sense of stability for the children. This means that, where the couple can keep or maintain traditions, they should. If every year, Christmas Eve is spent at the father’s parent’s house, then, if possible, that should be maintained. Keeping these family traditions alive will help give children that sense of stability they need and crave.